Things That Need To Change


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Stevas
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Or: My Thread For The Occasional Whine About Shit.

(Yeah, look, it is slightly different from all my other threads. It just is, okay? Fuck you.)

I realise that I'm asking quite a bit here, but basically, either the weather needs to change here (possibly using a big fuck off orbiting satellite-mounted laser - I'm working on it), or all UK homes need to be fitted with air con.

Four bastard rounds I lasted on Fight Night last night - FOUR BASTARD MOTHERFUCKING ROUNDS - before I got the overheating red rings shit. IT WAS HALF ELEVEN. 26 DE-FUCKING-GREES.

That it lasted JUST long enough to allow my girlfriend to beat my half-built future legend of boxing Cunty "Bam Bam" Douglas down with Ali is NEITHER HERE NOR THERE, DAMMIT.
#1 at 12:18:29 - 01/07/2009
Stevas
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"Tnings"? The hell? I'm clearly more pissed than even I thought.

Fuck it, I'm changing it back. I like Tnings. It's like, you know, things, but slightly broken.
#2 at 12:23:43 - 01/07/2009
Rhythm
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The heat's forcing my PS3 into permanent fan-overdrive mode. Having to consider breaking out the headphones for any late night gaming :-(
#3 at 13:26:01 - 01/07/2009
peej
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Rhythm said:The heat's forcing my PS3 into permanent fan-overdrive mode. Having to consider breaking out the headphones for any late night gaming :-(


Ditto, it's actually the first time I'd heard it.

Couple that with the cuntwads at the end of our garden having yet another barbecue last night, meaning we couldn't have the windows open at the back of the houe for the third night running - and it's not hard to see why people have psychotic episodes because of heat.

/posts shit through their letterbox
#4 at 13:31:06 - 01/07/2009
Stevas
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Mental, isn't it? I could understand it if I was trying to play in the middle of the day, but... half eleven? It's not like I have it tucked away either - it's sitting in a cupboard of about 2x2x2 (feet) on it's own, with the glass door open.

Is my 360 just a bit fuxxored, or is everyone having their internal fan kick in after mere minutes of play? I'd forgotten how noise that fucker can be.
#5 at 13:34:40 - 01/07/2009
Stevas
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Something Else That Needs To Change (Other Than The Weather): property TV.

I'm sick to here (waves gun at just around - or maybe a bit over - head-height) of these. Not because there's so fucking many (there are too many) or because there are so fucking many (did I mention there are too many?), but because we ALWAYS end up on a good note.

No. No more.

If some idiots buy some house and expect to sell it on for half a mill after just letting the builders do their own thing, not planning a single thing, hoping that it all turns out okay, while doing insanely stupid shit like trying to install a cast iron fucking bath in a bathroom that a) is too small and b) doesn't have a floor capable of supporting it, I do not want to hear that they still ended up making shitloads of money out of this.

Lie to me, for fucks sake. Have an hour long special of just them, sitting begging on the street, while the entire crew point and laugh. Maybe occasionally beating them. Whatever.

I do NOT want to cut from them saying, "well, we definitely learned the hard way. Next time we'll actually plan shit out, and have a bit more of a hands on approach to the builders... well, ANY sort of hands on, actually! We such idiots," to a voiceover saying: "Timothy and Clarissa decided not to sell at the recommended price as they considered it too low a return for all their 'hard work'. They now earn every month off some poor fucker renting instead, giving them two extra holidays per year."

Cunts. The housing market is fucked, hey? That's what they keep telling me. There MUST be people out there losing money on it. So how come there are no programs letting me laugh at them, what?
#6 at 13:48:08 - 01/07/2009
peej
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I only bother with Grand Designs, and I've seen one, maybe two episodes where things have gone horribly wrong and the people involved have lost money and ended up with a botched pile of shite.

See, to be honest I really don't need to see Tarquin and Gastronella blarting a couple of million on something that looks like a fucking retail unit but has taps that cost a grand each. And everything works out tickety boo. What I want to see is Tarquin and Gastronella building their 2 million pound dream home over a fucking dinosaur nest, and the bastard come back to live and eat the pair of 'em, and Kevin McCloud, at the end of the programme.
#7 at 13:54:54 - 01/07/2009
Stevas
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Also: Johnny's Bacon Tasty's needs to change its bag. They're the best bacon crisps I can remember since Smokey Bacon Monster Munch, but what the fuck some french dude playing an accordion has to do with this, fuck only knows.
#8 at 13:55:29 - 01/07/2009
Stevas
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peej said:I only bother with Grand Designs, and I've seen one, maybe two episodes where things have gone horribly wrong and the people involved have lost money and ended up with a botched pile of shite.

See, to be honest I really don't need to see Tarquin and Gastronella blarting a couple of million on something that looks like a fucking retail unit but has taps that cost a grand each. And everything works out tickety boo. What I want to see is Tarquin and Gastronella building their 2 million pound dream home over a fucking dinosaur nest, and the bastard come back to live and eat the pair of 'em, and Kevin McCloud, at the end of the programme.


Yes.
Wait, didn't I just say that?
#9 at 13:56:54 - 01/07/2009
peej
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Yeah but I wanted to get across the point about the dinosaur nest. No fuckit, let's go with Godzilla. Grand Designs where someone builds over Godzilla's egg depository
#10 at 14:05:36 - 01/07/2009
mal
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I was hoping that, since the housing market isn't shooting through the roof any more, we'd get rid of some of those property programmes.

But no, the fuckers are still producing them - though now they're using old footage, or they've started producing new 'can jimmy and sally make a profit in spite of the housing market going to shit halfway into their build time'. I DON'T CARE. I do care that in this hot weather my TV reception goes to shit and I've only got seven channels I can get reliably - and then three of them are showing bloody wimbledon while the other four show property programmes. FUCK OFF WITH YOU!
#11 at 15:51:11 - 01/07/2009
Rhythm
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Get ready for another influx, Mal, because prices are already seeing a sustained rise again
#12 at 16:36:00 - 01/07/2009
Retroid
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I've never really understood the 'house worth' thing.

What does it matter unless you're going to sell the bloody thing? In which case you'd probably be stuffed because the price has now collapsed.
#13 at 12:27:43 - 09/07/2009
peej
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I guess people want to know that, if circumstances change and they have to get rid of it, that they're not going to get less than they paid for it.

But even so, a house is only really worth what someone's willing to pay for it. The economical climate will be a factor, but mostly it'll still be down to how much effort you're willing to put in to make your property saleable, and where your property is.
#14 at 12:36:38 - 09/07/2009

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